:: It Feels Like A Miracle. ::

It Feels Like A Miracle.
 
It really does. I never knew, but always hoped, for a 100% positive appointment at UCLA. Just a few weeks ago we had our check up with Dr. Demmer, the opthamologist. The appointment did not start off the best when Dr. Demmer walked in and said, "Hi Connor, remember me?" and he responded, "Ya, I don't like you." Connor was very sad the entire drive there as he hates getting the drops in his eyes for dilation and Dr. Demmer is the one who does it. I was a bit nervous, but Dr. Demmer moved right along with his tests and observations and Connor listened and did everything perfectly. During the exam I was in amazement at how well Connor was doing with testing. He was reading his letters and signs at a drastically smaller size than previous appointments. At the end, Dr. Demmer said we will not be dilating his eyes. Connor was SO very thankful to Dr. Demmer, it was pretty cute. As Dr. Demmer read to me Connor's results for the day I was a bit confused. He had told me Connor was seeing out of both eyes very well, mentioning his right eye was catching up with his left and getting stronger. WOW. Connor's vision was also read at a 20/40 :D! Double WOW.

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? Go celebrate! :D Go celebrate that Connor's eyes are getting better and thanks to you, your help, your loving support, we made a decision that was PERFECT for Connor. Switching his care to UCLA where they were on top of his condition, placing him in contacts and giving him the care his eyes needed before it was too late was PERFECT. All the testing we have been put through to find out what "disease" he has or does not have may have not been neccessary. When a child is born they have little sight. Their brain teaches their eyes to see at farther distances and it takes a few months. Connor was born nearsighted and went 8 months with his brain not training his eyes to see, because he could not and his brain stopped trying. After all we have been through, Dr. Demmer is most confident that Connor's condition is that he was not put in contacts early enough. His eye sight was so severe that contacts is what he needed when he was 6 months (when we finally discovered his eye sight). Now that Connor is awesome about wearing contacts & prefers them over his glasses, his brain is beginning to catch up and teach his eyes to see. Dr. Demmer said, I will not be surprised if we have fitted him properly for lenses that he will be seeing 20/20 by his next appointment! WHAT?! Crazy, right? Amazing grace of God! I am overwhelmed with happiness. Just 6 months ago, he tested at 20/100 & 20/90 & using one eye over the other. A huge difference and it is beyond words what we are feeling.

I will never be able to express the feelings I have had about Connor's vision. This time last year I thought I would be learning braille with my son prior to him entering kindergarten. I was surrounded by other moms who would always ask if I would intergrate him into a "normal" classroom. UGH, they got the stink eye! :D I would have nightmares that Connor was going to be the first toddler with an eye transplant, trying to keep him from living life blind. On a daily basis it would cross my mind about how as a parent I could bottle up Connor's confidence and happiness of life...fearing he would start to recognize he was not as good as the other kids because he can't see as well. I encouraged Connor to love music in hopes that he could be a great musician helping his confidence instead of trying to play sports and never feel successful. I would think about how he would never drive a car, even though he talks weekly about driving the family wagon and monster truck when he is 16. Just a few of many feelings...and just last spring his eyes were still getting worse. NOW.. I smile 25 times a day at Connor, thankful that now I don't have to worry that this may be the last time, that he will have a chance to do it all, do it well and see just as clearly as anybody else, with "tontacts". Unreal how life can change, so quickly.

As many of your know, my mom passed away in July. A few dear friends of mine mentioned that my mother will become the angel of his eyes. My Mom loved Connor differently than anyone else. Many times she mentioned on her facebook page, "He has my heart" under a cute picture of him. She was there, almost always at his appointments, or the first one to know the news, because she texted and called the entire appointment. Mom was also the one who researched UCLA, searching for someone who would take care of him and prevent his eyes from getting worse. At my Mom's memorial Connor went to throw her ashes in the ocean, but instead they landed all down his back. He laughed, I laughed...in a sense it was closure that she was another beautiful angel in heaven, but one who would look over Connor. Crazy how life can happen. Since her passing, Connor has not put up any fights for getting his contacts in and asks for them in the morning. He had one appointment with his contact specialist in August which said everything looked good. (Crazy the appointment before that they were concerned why his eyes were getting worse again, changing his prescription 3 times in the spring). And now this past appointment...throwing Stickler's Syndrome out the window and "Connor has a rare disease that we have just not discovered yet" out too. Life changes quickly in many ways, his eyes we are so thankful for!!!